Bullying is the use of force, threat, or coercion to abuse, intimidate, or aggressively dominate others. The behavior is often repeated and habitual. One essential prerequisite is the perception, by the bully or by others, of an imbalance of social or physical power, which distinguishes bullying from conflict. When you first hear such definitions, it […]

Question behind the question

Listening to the person on the other side of the table and answering the question they asked is a good first step. But, it is only a first step. When we take a moment to listen and understand where they’re coming from, we hear the question behind the question. That’s when we get a real […]

Direction, Outcomes, Processes

The most important goal setting tool is direction. We might get goals and processes wrong but we always want to be moving in the right direction. When in doubt, over index on getting direction right. For example, “I want to get fitter” or “We need to acquire more paying customers” or “I want to get smarter […]

Gym goer motivations and Doug Conant

Professors Kaitlin Woolley and Ayelet Fischback from the University of Chicago tested whether gym goers were more motivated by the workout process or workout results. The found that gym goers depended on extrinsic motivation (or the outcomes of a good work out) when they were planning to go the gym. However, during the workout, intrinsic […]

Waiting for blockbuster moments

It is human nature to wait for blockbuster moments. The next blockbuster moment is, as a rule, a few weeks or months away. Life will get significantly better, we tell ourselves, after that next thing. But, it never does – at least not in the way we imagine. The worries, problems and obstacles of today are […]

Day 1

There’s a story about how U2, the Irish Rock band, always described themselves as “arriving.” They believed that the moment they “arrived” as a band would be the moment they became irrelevant. I thought of the “arriving” analogy as I read Jeff Bezos’ letter to shareholders and his insistence that it is always Day 1 at […]

The real problem

The problem they mentioned is not the real problem. The problems people mention are those that sound acceptable. So, they sound logical and generally “make sense.” “The price is not right.” Or “I feel this might not be the right time.” But, if we were to peel the onion to understand the real concerns, they would […]

Reasons to always share credit

There are many reasons to be obsessive about always sharing credit with everyone who helped you. 1. You show you care. That’s the essence of leadership. 2. People appreciate it. So, they will want to work with you and care for you. It feels great and it shows up in performance reviews too. 3. You set […]

The life sine wave

Equanimity, as a concept, really fascinated me for the longest time. It wasn’t something I managed at any stage in the first 20 odd years of my life. I simply moved up and down with the flow of life. However, writing every day on this blog gave me a sense of balance and perspective that […]