30 nice thoughts for the new year..

No idea why I named this post 30 when there are 45… name aside, well worth re-posting!

30 nice thoughts
1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.
12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don’t worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ‘In five years, will this matter?’
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.
35. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative — dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s,we’d grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift.”

Comfort – A different side..

I love holidays.. The only learnings I have been able to update all of semester have been Good morning quotes. Now is the time for reflection..!

Back to comfort.. Comfort is the seeming end objective for a big lot of us. Comforts are those things we associate with the good life. :)

What I’ve seen more often than not is that the feeling of comfort is probably the most damaging thing that happens to us..

Why else do married women complain – ‘You were so different before we got married’. Of course, after the period of romance, all of a sudden, things are taken for granted. Why else do we take the food we eat for granted, all the wonderful comforts that we have for granted and complain?

Why is it that we are moved when we see a gripping movie/gripping message and ‘vow’ to take less for granted? Just because we are shaken out of our comfort zone. Happened to me when I was brooding over rejections from potential employers along with other semester issues and a close friend’s parent passed away. All of a sudden I was shaken, thanking the lord for the safety of loved ones in my life. All the small things per se wilted away..

This is why I love the maxim.. ‘Live like you would drop dead by midnight..’. All of a sudden, the small things go away.. The best of winners are those who don’t spend too much time in their comfort zone. When Ferguson won the 2006-07 Premier league title, everyone lauded him. But, he went on and spent 60 million on re-inforcement and the result has been a champions league in addition to 2 more premier leagues. That’s a man who doesn’t believe in a comfort zone..

That’s not to say we should never be comfortable and enjoy the small joys that comfort brings us. Again, enjoying small comforts and just letting ourselves being comfortable are two different things..

Ralph Waldo Emerson once found a piece of paper when he was walking in the street and he said the piece of advice changed his life.

‘Always Do what you are afraid to do’ was all
that was written on that note..

Now, how do I go about making this real i.e. implementing this? Weekly reminders?

Action cures fear..

“Fear of all kinds and sizes is a form of psychological infection. We can cure a mental infection the same way we cure a body infection—with specific, proved treatments… condition yourself with this fact: all confidence is acquired, developed. No one is born with confidence. Those people around you who radiate confidence, who have conquered worry, who are at ease everywhere and all the time, acquired their confidence, every bit of it.” ~ David Schwartz from The Magic of Thinking Big

Action cures fear. Indecision, postponement, on the other hand, fertilize fear…

Vinod’s Big Value add..

There are 3 kinds of people. They talk about..

1) People
2) Events
3) Ideas..

Ever since I’ve heard this, I’ve wanted to get in completely into the ideas bracket and I’ve arranged with my coach friend to fine me $5 every time he catches me talking people(after a 1st warning.. :D)!

Thanks Vinod.. This one stuck.. :)

Isn’t failure a wonderful thing?

I was just grappling with a few thoughts and it occurred to me that failure is among the best things that can happen to us, like it or not..

Let’s visit Man Utd after the Champs league final in Moscow after beating Chelsea. The mood is jubiliant, players partying and the like. It’s only when Ferguson gets back to Old Trafford does he go back to the drawing board to plot next season’s trophy attack..

How about when Utd were given a lesson in Rome this summer? Every player’s mind must have had just 1 thought – what could we have done differently? What went wrong?

It is true that we must focus on things that go well but if it isn’t for failure, we would never question, we would never ponder as to what went wrong…

1) Failure makes us humble. It does to me at atleast.. else I’d be flying too high for my own good..

2) Failure makes me think as to the things I can change – that within my circle of influence that would make me a better person that I would not have thought of had every step of mine led to success..

3) Failure makes me thankful for the things I take for granted.. a lovely family, wonderful friends, blessed teachers and mentors and great blessings like lovely food, money to spend and the like..

4) Failure makes me question my own deepest values, as to what really matters and whether this would matter to me 50 years from now.

5) And failure keeps me prepared for change..

Failure unfortunately is treated as a negative word. I’ve never felt its wrong to fail.. Falling down and staying down are two very different things.

And in the words of Rocky Balboa(from memory..inaccuracy alert :)) – ‘Life will make you fall down to your knees and stay there if you let it. It is never about how hard you hit but about how hard you get hit and keep moving, how hard you get hit.. and keep moving..’

:)

Short term thinking..

can hardly ever lead to good, can it?

This is with reference to the thought I had as I was just settling in at home last week. Should I spend time to set up my room as per my likes or just live out of a suitcase for example as I’m barely here for a couple of weeks..

What I did realize is that short term thinking will never improve a system. Let’s take, for example, a hotel room where we are housed for a few days. I doubt if we would spend too much time thinking about how our actions would impact the future cleanliness/use-ability of the room. We’ll do as we like and move on.. not too many emotions attached.

If we keep moving about treating places we stay, work etc like hotel rooms, we would never live up to the maxim of ‘leave everything a little better than you found it’..

That, to me, was quite an observation. So, time I got to room cleaning! :)

Be Unreasonable..

“Everything you want should be yours: the type of work you want; the relationships you need; the social, mental, and aesthetic stimulation that will make you happy and fulfilled; the money you require for the lifestyle that is appropriate to you; and any requirement that you may (or may not) have for achievement or service to others. If you don’t aim for it all, you’ll never get it all. To aim for it requires that you know what you want.” ~

Richard Koch from The 80/20 Principle

Thoughts after a memorable weekend..

1) Friends are special. Period.

2) Spending time with friend’s parents while visiting them is one thing. Having fun is quite another. We had a lovely dinner organized thanks to Vik and family and watching the parents sing, dance was an amazing feeling. Heart-warming to see them break barriers..

3) Was very nice to have a change in environment. We’ve had lot of fun times in Singapore but generally the fun is a variation of the usual. This was a different environment with parents around, new territory(home for most..) and brought out a different side in people – a fun side!

4) Money doesn’t buy class. Money can never buy mental peace. I hope I always remember this..

5) Love is all it takes to break barriers. It takes time to love people but its important to give them that time. I saw an important barrier break and it was heart-warming..

6) All this talk about breaking barriers reminds me of the quote – ‘Some things take time, 9 women can’t make a baby in a month..’ :)

7) Recognized a few wonderful things to learn from people. Especially KD, who has this ability to fit in without effort, without any detractors. Blessed to have a friend like him.

8) Probably the best 2 things I did was recognize I was losing my cool after hours and hours of driving and take some time off and then also catch some sleep before morning.. Made it a good mix and gave me confidence that I can become more self-aware and sensitive. It has to start with being sensitive to myself.. else I will always stay the thick skinned buffalo.. :)

9)Important to change environment with your loved ones.. loved the change!

10) Parents are the reason we are who we are. It’s nice hanging out with a bunch of people but meeting the parents brought us all to realize the primary drivers behind all of this. Bringing a child up is the toughest thing in the world and the importance of parents can NEVER be overstated..

11) Cows rushed in when we were driving down the east coast road. I was lucky to swerve away. Had we been travelling slightly slower or had there been a car on the other side of the road, I shudder to think what would have happened. And reflecting back, I am still uncertain how it could have been avoided. I guess some things are best left at the hands of god..

12) A lot of things will change will time. Hence, the present is really a gift..

13)It’s nice to understand how people work and what makes them tick. Once we do understand them, it is easier to live and work with them..

14) The importance of simple courtesies(like a please, sorry and thank you) can again, never be over-stated. In our teenage years, we sometimes tend to think these are unnecessary. Unfortunately(or fortunately), communication, or the lack thereof, is the only reason why relations break..

15) Falling in love is heart thing. Staying committed is mind thing. It is easier to get into a football team than to survive 15 years in it, training day in and day out, accepting the highs and lows without quitting. It is the same with a relationship.. We all have the power of choice.. And I know that, in my heart of hearts, I’d rather be a Paul Scholes than a David Beckham even if it means missing the allure of Madrid and Los Angeles..

16) Football365 does 16 conclusions. I guess this has turned out that way without me meaning to. A lot of these are very simple thoughts that occurred but writing it down itself has been great as it helps me revisit this weekend..

There are many more learnings. Maybe more some other time.. :)